Love Is A Heroe's Journey: Single, Dating, And Looking For Love
Monday, 20 October 2008 00:00
Dating, being single, and searching for love is a Heroe's Journey. Your journey is your story. Stories tell others who you are; they help you reconstruct what has happened in the past; and they help you make sense of your experiences. If you are not aware of your stories, however, and how you weave your attitude into your life’s events, your stories may be telling a lot more about you than you realize.
To be single and to date requires you to share about yourself. If you hear yourself saying, "There's no one out there," and, "I'll never find anyone I really want," these statements reveal that you have listened to your doubts and have become stuck, thinking love is hopeless. However, we have the power to change our story. In fact, each of us has the potential to live a unique and even inspirational story.
Joseph Campbell articulated the heroe’s journey in his book of mythology, The Hero With A Thousand Faces, in 1949. When George Lucas wrote Star Wars, he relied on Campbell’s blueprint, which he had read when he was in college, and which he used to craft his epic movie.
Here is an abbreviated version of The Heroe's Journey and how it applies to singles, dating, and finding your love. Everyone of us lives out this journey in one way or another.
Read more: Love Is A Heroe's Journey: Single, Dating, And Looking For Love
Are You Starting Over? How To Date Again
Monday, 13 October 2008 00:00
Are you starting over? Has your life been turned upside down? Did you have to say goodbye to what you thought was a great relationship, and start all over again? The starting over trauma can happen to anyone at any time in their life. Breakups, death, or divorce can leave you feeling all alone and unprepared for what is facing you.
Single and dating is not a place where you thought you would ever be again. So, what is it like to start over? What can you do to pep up your life with new energy and hope, when you feel tired and hope-less?
How To Get Your Ex Back The Conversation Part III
Monday, 06 October 2008 00:00
Fifty-four-year-old Sam had spent over a year getting his life on track. His words were positive, he was enjoying his career and supportive staff, and he was enthused about his art classes. Friends were fixing him up with dates, he was meeting women on the Internet, and females were calling him and asking him out. Word was out among his friends and business colleagues that he was a changed man.
Sam decided to take a trip to Paris. He would have preferred to go with someone but he said the only person he could imagine being with in such a lovely place was—his Ex girlfriend. People were astonished that Sam would take a trip alone. But he didn’t take anyone and he went anyway because he had told himself all his life that someday…he would go to Paris.
Read more: How To Get Your Ex Back The Conversation Part III
How To Get Your Ex Back The Impact of Boundaries & Baggage Part II of III
Monday, 29 September 2008 00:00
Sam was devastated when his girlfriend broke up with him. He knew she was often unhappy with their relationship but he didn’t know how to fix it. When she left him, he sought help. He was miserable, depressed, and lonely.
Sam had no idea that his attitude and negativity drove his girlfriend away. Like many people who are alone, the reason he wanted a girlfriend was to make him feel better. She tried, but the barriers to his happiness were just too big. And ultimately, his problems were not hers to fix.
Once Sam was in coaching, he found his enthusiasm for life. He was feeling better than he ever had. He was excited about his sculpting and ironwork classes he was taking and he enjoyed his new friends. He worked out three times a week, walked to work to stay fit, and started dating. Life was good, but he often said—he was still in love with his ex-girlfriend.
Read more: How To Get Your Ex Back The Impact of Boundaries & Baggage Part II of III
How To Get Your Ex Back The Breakup Part I of III
Monday, 22 September 2008 00:00
When Sam was separated and going through a divorce, he met a gorgeous woman he fell madly in love with. He was fifty-four and she was thirty-six. She loved him back but they had a lot of problems from the beginning of the relationship. After one year, she left him. He was so depressed he sought counseling, anti-depressant medications, and guidance from a psychiatrist. Unfortunately, nothing worked.
When Sam called me, he was as forlorn and hopeless as one could be and still be functioning. Everything he said was negative. I asked, “What do you want?” He answered, “All I want is her. I know I screwed up but I don’t know what I did.”
Sam committed many of the errors that other people do when they are just coming out of a long term marriage. He didn’t mean to. He was a good guy and he was doing the best that he could. But not knowing how to date, he did a lot of damage.
Here is what Sam did to drive his girlfriend away:
Read more: How To Get Your Ex Back The Breakup Part I of III
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